So, I've come to some realizations lately. Things I always knew, but didn't know I knew maybe. Well anyway. So, lately if I've whined about my job or talked about looking elsewhere, people have asked me, "Well, what do you want to do?" "What kind of career do you want to have?" The only answer I can come to with that is that I don't really want a career. I want to be a stay at home mom. I know that will be a ton of work in and of itself, but it's still what I want, even if I have to work a little on the side to help pay the bills. I want to be a mom and do things on my terms, and just take care of my kids and my husband. Caring for others that I love is the only thing I've really enjoyed in life. I'm good at many things, but this is what I want to be the best at. It's hard when you've been trying to have a family for over five years, but I'm not giving up just yet. My time will come.
Alright, I just had to get this out. There is no real reason for me to share this other than because I wanted to express what so often confuses people about me. This is me and this is who I want to be.
Suicide
14 years ago
3 comments:
You speak the words I think. I can't figure out what else to say that doesn't sounds trite. I know how you feel, and my heart feels for you.
That is a great dream to have. Not everyone will be a good mom. The world needs really good mothers, and I hope you get to be one of them!
Sara, to other people I usually just say that I want to take care of others. It's totally accurate, just not specific. But being me, I'm usually pretty up front with it unless it's a job interview or something. It's kind of crazy.
Thanks Kathryn, I hope I will be too. Well, I know one way or another I'll be a mom, but being a good mom will be the trick to it.
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